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How to Blend in with the Locals

1Drink Something Made Here
No, that cheap swill won't cut it.
No, that cheap swill won’t cut it.
2Drink Something Made Here
No, that cheap swill won't cut it.
No, that cheap swill won’t cut it.
3Make Friends With People Who Matter
They will make your life a lot easier.
They will make your life a lot easier.
4Make Friends With People Who Matter
They will make your life a lot easier.
They will make your life a lot easier.
5Dress down, Ditch the Ski Gear
Only gapers are seen after dark in bars with their ski pants on.
Only gapers are seen after dark in bars with their ski pants on.
6Dress down, Ditch the Ski Gear
Only gapers are seen after dark in bars with their ski pants on.
Only gapers are seen after dark in bars with their ski pants on.
7Ski by Numbers
All those fancy names Vail Resorts uses for their lifts are useless.
All those fancy names Vail Resorts uses for their lifts are useless.
8Ski by Numbers
All those fancy names Vail Resorts uses for their lifts are useless.
All those fancy names Vail Resorts uses for their lifts are useless.
9Daily Lift Tickets are for Suckers
A walk up daily lift ticket will cost you north of $160 and isn't much cheaper when you purchase it online in advance.
A walk up daily lift ticket will cost you north of $160 and isn’t much cheaper when you purchase it online in advance.
10Daily Lift Tickets are for Suckers
A walk up daily lift ticket will cost you north of $160 and isn't much cheaper when you purchase it online in advance.
A walk up daily lift ticket will cost you north of $160 and isn’t much cheaper when you purchase it online in advance.
11Kids Like Lanyards
It's OK to be a kid at heart, but ditch that yellow thing flapping around your neck.
It’s OK to be a kid at heart, but ditch that yellow thing flapping around your neck.
12Kids Like Lanyards
It's OK to be a kid at heart, but ditch that yellow thing flapping around your neck.
It’s OK to be a kid at heart, but ditch that yellow thing flapping around your neck.
13Fall Off Chair, Be Heckled
Pay attention when loading the lift!  Seriously.
Pay attention when loading the lift! Seriously.
14Fall Off Chair, Be Heckled
Pay attention when loading the lift!  Seriously.
Pay attention when loading the lift! Seriously.
15Every Day is Different, Keep Racking up the Vert
You have no excuse not to get as many laps as you can given all the high-speed quads on this mountain.
You have no excuse not to get as many laps as you can given all the high-speed quads on this mountain.
16Every Day is Different, Keep Racking up the Vert
You have no excuse not to get as many laps as you can given all the high-speed quads on this mountain.
You have no excuse not to get as many laps as you can given all the high-speed quads on this mountain.
17The Early Bird Gets the Powder and the Barstool
If you're getting on the lift at 9:00 a.m. you're so far off the back that you might as well go home and back to bed.
If you’re getting on the lift at 9:00 a.m. you’re so far off the back that you might as well go home and back to bed.
18The Early Bird Gets the Powder and the Barstool
If you're getting on the lift at 9:00 a.m. you're so far off the back that you might as well go home and back to bed.
If you’re getting on the lift at 9:00 a.m. you’re so far off the back that you might as well go home and back to bed.

Sure, you have the puffy down jacket and a logoed beanie. You’ve got an Epic Pass and know where the Vail outlet of Loaded Joe’s is. You may even know the name of your bartender at your favorite aprés ski watering hole. But if you really want to pass as a local (and not the cheap Front Range weekend warrior facsimile of one) then you’ll need to step up your game by following a few simple rules.

Published in the 3 Magical Days issue of Vailmag.